My December
by Mad Genius Juul
Summary: What would you do if someone very close to you just disappeared? Songfic to Linkin Park's My December. Oneshot. Slight MacxGoo.


**My December**

**another angsty one shot by Juul**

**A/N: Another songfic, this time to Linkin Park's My December. Takes place when Mac is twelve years old.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends. I didn't write "My December," Chester ****Bennington and Mike Shinoda did.**

**Warnings: Character death, some language, depression.**

Twelve year old Mac walked down the sidewalk past Foster's Home For Imaginary Friends. He spent quite a great deal of his childhood there. But many still considered him a child. Mac begged to differ. Children, in his eyes, were carefree and innocent. Not cold and tainted.

Ever since that fateful day when Mac was only eight years old, he's been visiting Foster's after school. In the young teen's eyes, now, those four years all went down the drain. And normally, Mac loved the December holidays; going to the mall with his friends and looking at all the decorations; having snowball fights; helping Frankie and Wilt decorate Foster's. But not now. Mac absolutely _hated _December.

Mac stopped and looked towards the old Victorian mansion, a distant expression on his face. "No," his mind told him, "don't. There's too many memories."

Memories of him:

_Blooregard Q. Kazoo._

**This is my December**

**This is my time of the year**

**This is my December**

**This is all so clear**

**This is my December**

**This is my snow covered home**

**This is my December**

**This is me alone**

Mac finally let a tear escape his eyes. Exactly a year ago, on December 5, there was an accident. Mac, Bloo, Goo, Wilt, Coco, and Eduardo were all sliding around on the ice that covered the flooded front yard from the last rain storm. Everything was completely fine, that is, until Mac decided to try and slide across the road and jump into the yard and try to keep sliding. He wanted to do that just to show off for once.

Well, Mac _did _slide across the road. But a semi was coming for him. And he slipped on the ice and fell down. But Bloo, being Mac's best friend and all, and also eventually becoming a brother type to Mac, went to push him out of the way. And Bloo ended up getting hit.

Ever since that day, Mac really couldn't focus much on anything anymore. It was like nothing even mattered anymore to Mac. Bloo was the closest thing to a real, true, honest to goodness brother type to Mac. Terrance was a total asshole up until recently when he turned seventeen and went off to a vocational school. Mac's mother was almost always gone; and when she wasn't, hardly acknowledged either of her children. Bloo always stuck up for Mac no matter what, even if Bloo _was _kind of mean and sarcastic sometimes. Bloo was always there for Mac, especially when no one else was. And in a way, it was as if Bloo was Mac's crazy, outgoing side.

But that part of Mac was now dead, just like Bloo.

**And I (Just wish that I didn't feel like it was something I missed)**

**And I (Take back all the things I said to make you feel like that)**

**And I (Just wish that I didn't feel like it was something I missed)**

**And I (Take back all the things that I said to you)**

Mac really regretted ever fighting with Bloo, now. Mac would sometimes think that he took Bloo for granted all these years. But it never occurred to the boy that Bloo would actually be gone someday. Mac never really thought that imaginary friends could die or disappear in any way, until Bloo did.

Even going to Foster's to visit Wilt, Eduardo, Coco, and Frankie was hard. It brought back too many memories. That place was Bloo's home for God's sake! The friends at Foster's (even Mr. Herriman) were all very saddened by Bloo's untimely death. Wilt and Frankie in particular worried about Mac. Not that they were the only ones who've noticed Mac's sudden personality change, but they were the only ones most likely to help him through it.

Without Bloo by his side, Mac felt very awkward, very distant from everyone else. He knew that Frankie, Goo, Wilt and the others meant well by trying to help him, but he didn't want their help. He didn't think he deserved it. With Bloo gone, Mac felt uncomfortable around anyone and everyone else-- even Goo and she was his _girlfriend_ for the sake of all things holy! But Bloo was his best friend, and nobody would ever replace him-- even if Bloo was still alive and Mac would eventually outgrow him. Blooregard Q. Kazoo would always be Mac's best buddy.

**And I'd give it all away**

**Just to have somewhere to go to**

**Give it all away**

**Just to have someone to come home to**

Mac sighed as he made up his mind to actually go into Foster's. He walked down the driveway and up to the front door. Mac closed his eyes and knocked. Frankie opened the door.

"Hey, Mac," she said, obviously forcing a smile onto her face, "come in. Wilt and the others are in the kitchen making hot chocolate. You look like you could use some of that." The redhead put her hand on Mac's shoulder. "I know you miss Bloo and all, but think about it. Would he want you to be like this?"

Mac shook his head and went into the kitchen. Goo, Wilt, Eduardo, and Coco were all gathered around a small table, talking and drinking hot chocolate.

Goo spotted Mac and said, "Mac! Hey! What's up?" Then the not-as-hyper-active-as-she-used-to-be girl dashed over to him and hugged him.

"Hey, Goo," said Mac, trying to sound cheerful. "Hey, guys," he said, looking at the imaginary friends.

"Hi Mac!" said Wilt.

"Hola, Mac!" said Eduardo.

"Coco!" said Coco.

Mac managed a weak smile. He knew that they would always be his friends and care about him, but there was just no other in the world who could comfort him and make him smile like Bloo could. After all, Mac _did _create Bloo in the first place.

**This is my December**

**These are my snow covered trees**

**This is me pretending**

**This is all I need**

Mac sat down between Goo and Wilt and put his head down on the table.

"Coco?" asked Coco as she held up a cup of hot chocolate with her foot.

"Nah," said Mac, quietly.

Goo was worried about Mac a whole lot more than he thought. "Mac?" she asked. The boy looked up with tears forming in his eyes. "Hey, let's go somewhere alone for a little bit, okay?" Goo tugged on Mac's sweater as she got up, and the couple left the room.

"Mac," Goo said in a quiet, comforting voice, "you miss him don't you?"

"Yeah," said Mac, sitting down on a couch and burying his face in his hands.

Goo sat down next to him. "It's okay, though. Bloo wouldn't want you to be like this, would he? He'd want you to get on with your life and not to spend the rest of it worrying about him."

"I know that, Goo!" said Mac, his voice breaking as he finally burst into tears. "Dammit! Everybody tells me that! 'Bloo would want you to be happy,' 'Bloo would want you to go on!' But I can't! The truth is, I don't think I _can _go on!" Mac closed his eyes and shook his head. The distraught boy noticed the concerned, scared look on Goo's face, and immediately he felt guilty for yelling at her like that. "I'm sorry, Goo. It's just that, I dunno, Bloo was my best friend. He was like a brother to me. And losing him was just too much."

"I'm sorry he's gone, Mac," said Goo, putting her arm around his shoulders. "We're all sorry. And we all miss him."

**And I (Just wish that I didn't feel like it was something I missed)**

**And I (Take back all the things I said to make you feel like that)**

**And I (Just with that I didn't feel like it was something I missed)**

**And I (Take back all the things that I said to you)**

"Mac," said Goo, looking her boyfriend directly in the eyes, "listen to me. No matter what happens, I'll always be there for you. You got that?"

"Yeah," replied Mac, wiping the tears from his eyes.

"And besides me," added Goo, "you've always got Wilt, Ed, Coco, and Frankie. We'll all stick around for you, I swear." Goo smiled at Mac, who actually gave her a true, believable smile.

"I guess I do," said Mac. "But I'll always miss Bloo. Sometimes, it's weird, though. It's like he's still here somewhere. I can feel it."

"Mac, you know and I know that I'm a just a tad crazy," Goo said, getting a small laugh out of Mac, "but I believe that when you die, your soul just goes on. If you were a good person, your soul goes on, and you look over the people that you love, and keep them out of trouble."

"So, you're saying, that Bloo is like my guardian angel?" asked Mac.

"Yep," said Goo.

**And I'd give it all away**

**Just to have somewhere to go to**

**Give it all away**

**Just to have someone to come home to**

The two pre-teens sat on the couch together for a good ten minutes or so, talking. Reminiscing. Mostly about all the good times they used to have with Bloo. That was when Goo finally realized how much Bloo meant to Mac. She always knew that they were close, even though Bloo could be an ass sometimes, but she had no idea that they were almost like brothers. Mac told Goo that he expected her to think he was weird for considering Bloo a brother, but Goo told him that everybody needed someone to look up to, someone to go to for advice.

Later that night, around 8:30, Goo walked Mac to his apartment. She knew that it was not only her duty as his girlfriend to stay by his side in this difficult situation, but also her duty as his friend. Mac needed a friend, especially now. Goo knew for a fact that Mac would not do anything to harm himself, but she was worried that he might get depressed or stop eating, you know, stuff like that. As long as Goo was around, Mac would always have someone to talk to, someone to go to for help.

**This is my December**

**This is my time of the year**

**This is my December**

**This is all so clear**

Mac laid on his bed, staring at the ceiling, just thinking. His talk with Goo did help a whole lot. He didn't feel nearly as bad as he did earlier. But he was still sad and distraught. He knew that eventually he might get over Bloo's death, but as of right now, he felt as if he would never get over it. Mac sat up and walked over to his dresser in the corner of his room. He opened the top drawer and pulled out a framed picture of him and Bloo when he was eight years old. They were both smiling. Mac noticed his sad reflection in the glass, but that soon changed as he saw Bloo's face smiling back at him.

**Give it all away**

**Just to have somewhere to go to**

**Give it all away**

**Just to have someone to come home to**

**Give it all away**

**Just to have somewhere to go to**

**Give it all away**

**Just to have someone to come home to**

The boy carried the small picture frame over to his bedside table and gently placed it next to his alarm clock. Then he changed into his pajamas and climbed into the bed, looking out the window at the beautiful night sky and all of the stars. And he could have sworn that he saw Bloo's ghost looking in through his bedroom window. Somehow, now, after this long year of many tears and hardships, Mac thought that he would be okay. He didn't just think that he would be okay. He knew it.

**A/N #2: Man that was hard to write. Not just because I have a migrane, but also because I cried while writing this (I usually don't get ****emotional very often, but I can kind of relate to this story, as I consider my best friend a sister and I would be crushed if something bad ****ever happened to her). I hope this story was worth reading. Comment if you wish.**


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